Best friend and the guy you like are dating
I've never been "friends first" with a boy, though the concept is quite fascinating. Many experts advise that couples should be friends first.
Imagine you meet someone that you're not attracted to. Then the relationship is based on personal compatibility, not just sexual chemistry. Grace Cornish avers that romances that begin as friendships are more likely to succeed: "You're always kind to your friend. There's no respect if you become possessive and controlling." "If you have a genuine friendship, you're not going to pretend to be someone you're not so a person can marry you.
Then later, as some times goes by, suddenly, you begin to notice all these fantastic qualities about them that you didn't know existed, and boom! You're looking for your friend to get ahead by looking out for his best interest. Some people are on their best behavior until they cross the threshold. But your true nature will surface when you're a person's friend first.
When you're true friends from the beginning, you don't have to pretend." I don't disagree with anything Cornish says, but why does she make it seem like honesty, kindness and respect are only inherent in friendships, not in romance?
A boyfriend is actually a friend that you'd like to get kinky with as soon as possible.
When I meet someone, I can size him up in about 30 seconds and decide whether or not we will ever see each other naked.
If I'm attracted to a guy, then I really can't befriend him.
I'll be "friendly," but a real friendship requires some level of honesty and ease.
I know some people are capable of masking their true feelings, a la Joey Potter, but that's just not in my nature.
It just sounds like your waiting for the inevitable letdown, you know?